Are celebs busting the ‘surrogacy stigma’?

Desi girl Priyanka Chopra commanded the spotlight last week as she announced the arrival of her baby via surrogacy. The internet erupted with reactions of all types – some congratulated Priyanka and Nick Jonas on the good news, some others attacked the actress for ‘outsourcing’ her child’s birth. From degrading to mean to outright vitriolic, there were opinions of varying degrees, once again bringing to the fore the stigma associated with surrogacy in the society.
The debate hit the roof when noted author Taslima Nasreen shared her views on surrogacy in a series of tweets, “How do those mothers feel when they get their ready-made babies through surrogacy? Do they have the same feelings for the babies like the mothers who give birth to the babies? Surrogacy is possible because there are poor women. Rich people always want the existence of poverty in society for their own interests. If you badly need to raise a child, adopt a homeless one. Children must inherit your traits—it is just a selfish narcissistic ego.” Taslima was abused by trolls for her comments on surrogacy claiming it’s her stone-age idea to not rent wombs for making babies. She later clarified with a tweet, “My surrogacy tweets are about my different opinions on surrogacy. Nothing to do with Priyanka-Nick. I love the couple.”

Incidentally, the Surrogacy Regulation Bill and ART (Assisted Reproductive Technology Regulation) Bill was passed by Rajya Sabha in December 2021 to curb unethical practices related to issues of sex selection and exploitation of the surrogate.

This led us to our #BigStory this week where we spoke to experts, industry insiders, filmmakers, and celebs to seek various perspectives and find out if celebrities embracing parenthood through surrogates can play any role in busting the surrogacy stigma in the society.

Bollywood and surrogacy

Examples of cases where Bollywood celebs opted for surrogacy are aplenty. In November 2021, Preity Zinta and Gene Goodenough announced the birth of her twins Gia and Jai via surrogacy.

In February 2020, Shilpa Shetty and Raj Kundra announced the birth of daughter Samisha via surrogacy. The actress explained she had a couple of miscarriages and that they had considered various options before choosing surrogacy.

In 2019, Shreyas Talpade and Deepti were blessed with a baby girl Aadya via surrogacy after 14 years of marriage.

Lisa Ray who has been under multiple life-long cancer medications became a mother of twin daughters via surrogacy in 2018. Lisa and husband Jason Dehni named them Sufi and Soleil.

Sunny Leone who had adopted a girl child Nisha in 2017, welcomed her twins Noah and Asher via surrogacy in 2018.

Karan Johar decided to be a single parent and opted for surrogacy. He welcomed twins Roohi and Yash in 2017. In his book ‘An Unsuitable Boy’, he said that opting for surrogacy was an emotional yet well thought out decision which he had taken after considering all the responsibilities and duties that come with being a parent.

Kapoor siblings Tusshar and Ekta surprised their parents when they opted for single parenthood. It was Tusshar who first opted for surrogacy to become a single parent to son Laksshya Kapoor in June 2016. Later Ekta followed suit and welcomed son Ravie Kapoor in January 2019.

Shah Rukh Khan and Gauri surprised everyone when they welcomed their third child AbRam via surrogacy in 2013.

Aamir Khan and Kiran Rao became parents to Azad via surrogacy in 2011. The couple decided to take the surrogacy route after Kiran suffered a miscarriage and uterine complications.

Sohail Khan and Seema Khan opted for surrogacy to have their second baby ten years after the birth of their first son, Nirvaan. The couple considered surrogacy as an option and Yohan was born in June 2011.

The social stigma

Evidently, there is a huge chunk of the population that does not agree with the concept of surrogacy. Such individuals turn out to be the biggest critics and/or trolls who take a stand against those celebrities who opt for surrogacy. Rohan Shankar, writer of Kriti Sanon’s film ‘Mimi’, which dealt with the good and bad side of surrogate mothers says the stigma around surrogacy has lessened now when compared to a few years ago. “It’s our culture that establishes that women should have a baby. But there are some who can’t conceive. Surrogacy is a blessing for them. Some women are career oriented, ambitious, and they don’t want to bear a child. It is not that big an issue in Western society. Even in our society, including rural areas, it is not. It’s only the trolls who are bothered. And if you observe, a majority of these trolls are men who know nothing about the way a mother feels about having a child.”

Actress Somy Ali says it’s sheer ignorance that prevails. “It’s more than common to have a child via surrogacy in the US. Yes, one is entitled to their opinion, but at least give an educated one. I applaud Priyanka Chopra for living life her way and making her own choices. This is her and her husband’s prerogative relevant to how they want to have a child. It’s a celebratory occasion and idiots will of course depict their lack of intellect by trolling anyone and everyone. To begin with, it’s none of their damn business. Congratulations to Priyanka and Nick for their baby. As for the trolls, get a damn life. We are in 2022!” she says.

Sufi singer and composer Sonam Kalra objected to Taslima Nasreen’s views on surrogacy. “I think it’s really sad that a moment of such happiness for anyone who has just welcomed a baby into their life, should be turned into something so negative. It is Priyanka’s life and we really don’t have the right to comment on something so personal. No one knows what a person or a family goes through in an attempt to have a child. Whatever her reasons were, for opting to have a child through surrogacy I’m sure they were very valid. I personally think surrogacy is a wonderful option for those who cannot have children otherwise, to have a chance at having a family. I do, however, believe that very stringent and ethical checks must be maintained. And in my personal experience, our doctor ensured the health, safety and well being of our surrogate at all times,” she says.
Why couples/individuals opt for surrogacy…

Couples often opt for surrogacy due to medical reasons. “Uterine factors, genital Tb cause significant damage to the uterus. Women who have repeated implantation failure also qualify. Women with uncontrolled diabetes, hypertension, Lupus, immunological conditions are best suited for surrogacy. Women with repeated miscarriages may need surrogacy,” explains Dr Firuza Parikh who is one of the top IVF specialists and an Assisted Reproduction Expert.

“Contrary to what people think, surrogacy is not the easiest option to choose. And I don’t believe it’s chosen by anyone because of convenience. Most people don’t know that even before a woman can get to the point of creating an embryo that’s viable for a surrogate to carry, she herself has to go through very taxing and challenging medical procedures and put her own body through a lot,” shares Sonam Kalra.

Bollywood’s acclaimed screenwriter duo Siddharth-Garima are soon making their directorial debut with a film ‘Dukaan’ based on commercial surrogacy in a town of Gujarat called Anand where about 5000 families are surviving on income generated from surrogacy. Speaking to ETimes, they share, “The world used to be a better place when medical science had not progressed so much. When somebody did not have a child they would look around, they would see where you can adopt from and in the process they’d end up doing some philanthropy, because they improved a life. Now when people have the money and the resources, medical science has progressed… they have an option. Why not have a child who looks like you, who has your traits? It’s not narcissistic… it’s an inherent, basic human need. Procreation or reproduction is a human need you have… to create a child, a mini version of yourself. If it can be facilitated by science and money, well and good. People should have a right to that.”

Having a child of their own who has their own traits is an inherent human need. “I have spoken to so many women and families who have been able to have children through surrogacy and each of them have told me they would never have known the joy of having a child if it hadn’t been for surrogacy. I do hope perceptions change and people see this positively and a chance for so many people to have joy in their life,” adds Sonam.

Advocate Samruddhi Porey, who directed the National Award winning Marathi film based on surrogacy ‘Mala Ai Vhaychay’ which was later remade as ‘Mimi’ in Hindi by Dinesh Vijan, reveals her film was based on a real life case that she fought years ago. Speaking to ETimes, she reveals how the subject was perceived when she was making the film. “When I made the film, I took the story to many producers, but no one believed in my film. They thought it was an insignificant story suited only for tent shows, and not the silver screen,” she recalls. According to her the new generation of females focus on career, often have a late marriage which may create issues in conceiving. In such cases they opt for surrogacy as an option to embrace parenthood.

Regulation of surrogacy – Yay or Nay?

While the Surrogacy Regulation Bill has come into action, not everyone seems to be welcoming the move wholeheartedly.

“Commercial surrogacy is a Rs 1300 crore industry in Gujarat that we are trying to show in our film. The film has a certain voice that we feel very strongly about. The government has finally banned surrogacy after the Bill has been passed in the parliament. One needs to understand that this industry is generating a living for so many. If surrogates get rights, no one can exploit them. When there is money involved in any sector, then there has to be a regulation coming into picture, not a ban. And yes, this is a business, we have to take into account the emotional aspect of business as well,” say director duo Siddharth-Garima.

Priyanka Chopra’s cousin Meera Chopra who earlier confirmed PeeCee had a baby girl, says, “Any technology or scientific development that gives birth to a life and happiness to the entire family should be encouraged and not be ashamed of. Surrogacy completes families for couples struggling with infertility or medical conditions, which is extremely common due to highly stressful lives of urban folks. Surrogacy or any such advanced fertility innovation should be wholeheartedly supported and adopted so that couples can find completeness.”

The other side

While taking stock of the situation and making laws around it, it also becomes important to consider the other side of the story. How does the life of a surrogate change after bearing the child? What drives them to take such a decision?

“A surrogate’s life changes completely when she takes the money and gives birth to the child. After hosting just one surrogacy, their life changes forever… they get big houses, they get a roof on their houses, they are able to send their children to school… If we see the other aspect from the (commercial surrogacy) industry point of view, it is something that is contributing to surrogate mothers as well,” says Garima who has done years of research for her film ‘Dukaan’ with Siddharth.

Maintaining that the rights of the surrogates should be safeguarded, Siddharth adds, “Mothers can give their surrogates a name. They can tell the world and their child, that I got my child through surrogacy and they can reveal the name of the surrogate. The world needs to reach a stage where we can confidently name the surrogate woman and not try to hide her identity, fearing she will come and claim a stake tomorrow.”

The future of surrogacy

With the ART Bill becoming a law, many of these scenarios will be redundant, says Dr Firuza Parikh.

A decision as extreme as to opt for surrogacy should be done only after everything else fails, opines Dr Hrishikesh Pai, President Elect of Federation of Obstetricians & Gynaecologists of India (FOGSI). “Majority of the women want to bear a child. Even actresses have done it in the past, many still do it. Some of them can’t have it and go for surrogacy, while some others do it for lifestyle purposes. These are not medical indications. The Surrogacy Act was passed in the parliament in December. So one can’t opt for surrogacy for lifestyle reasons. There is a long process of certification in case of medical reasons, and even when they qualify one can’t pay money to the surrogate. But in India, as per the Act, altruistic surrogacy is allowed, commercial surrogacy is not. Whether any citizen of India can go abroad and opt for surrogacy, I have no clue if it is legal or illegal,” he signs off.

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