#BigInterview: Kalpana Iyer on her comeback

It’s been very long that Kalpana Iyer spoke to any mainstream media. The lady has been living a very quiet life in Dubai with her sister and says that she’s at peace. But there was a time when she wasn’t happy. This was the time about 20 years ago when she went away from Bollywood’s hub- Mumbai.

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We caught up with Kalpana Iyer for a video chat. She was extremely patient while hearing all our grilling questions right from why she disappeared from B-town down till why she didn’t get married.
Let’s hear all about your struggle, success and disappearance. We begin by asking you the all-important question: Are you at peace?


Every night I thank God for whatever he has given me. I came to Dubai two decades ago. I was 45 then. There are certain decisions that are taken for certain reasons. I have no complaints in this country. I used to work here for a catering unit belonging to a friend who’s family. Pandemic has brought it to a certain amount of halt. But yes, I am at peace. It’s a home away from home. Jahan basera hota hai, wahi toh ghar hota hai (Home is where you settle down).

Why did you go away?

Too many reasons. I had finished ‘Hum Saath Saath Hain’. I was feeling a bit disappointed and not happy. After being paid and treated very well and having done good work, I experienced that things had reached a very odd point. I didn’t feel comfortable. There was something amiss. Also, I had to remind people to pay me for my work. I saw myself waiting for people to come to work. All said, I had stopped enjoying my work. I was dragging myself to the set. I needed money. But still I said to myself: What am I doing here?

Haan dukh hota hai (I do feel sad), I know I could have done a lot more. But rounding it off when I left, I wasn’t bitter. It’s just that perhaps the time had come to move on.

Any chance that you return to India and start being in the thick of things in acting again?

If I get a good role irrespective of its length, why not? I want the role to have substance. If it is going to be a comeback let it not be that people say achcha hota ki wahin rehti (would have been better had she stayed away).

I want to say here that I won’t be okay doing some of the content that is in today’s web shows and movies. I don’t agree with it. I will come back with what is right for my age and holds me in good respect. I won’t do anything that even might make people say that why she returned when she was leading a retired, comfortable life in Dubai.

What bothers you on OTT?

Many things. I have an issue with the freedom that the makers get on OTT. I am not a teeny-bopper. My mind doesn’t allow me to do those things, not even in the name of a good role.

What you’re saying is that you won’t use foul language and not be a part of content which has intimate scenes be it of any other actor. That whole milieu makes you uncomfortable…

What someone else does is not my problem, but my role shouldn’t have anything to do with that. I should be able to watch the projects that I do now with the children in my family. It shouldn’t be something that makes me feel funny in their midst. I am not saying that the children in my family will not see something other than what I see. The best of actors have done what they have done, but their other work pleases me more. But please underline, I am not being a prude. It’s just the way I am. I want to come back. Why would I say ‘no’ to good work?

Have you refused offers on similar grounds?

The reasons for declining some offers have been varied, not the ones I have spoken about. I wanted to just clarify something here and I did it. Haan sometimes log baat karte hai ki ismein aisa wala ek scene hai aur Kalpana tum kaam karogi kya, main kehti hoon mujhe maafi de doh (Sometimes people say this project has that kind of scene, will you work with this Kalpana, I simply ask to be forgiven). If you do something that you aren’t happy about, it won’t even look good on-screen.

You said you got unhappy with the work you’re getting. Now, you did ‘n’ number of dance numbers. Was it that filmmakers were therefore unable to envisage you in a meaty role when you turned 45?

No, I don’t think so. You see, I never had a PRO. Nobody handled my work. My social skills were nothing to talk about. I would say that I didn’t market myself. You need to tell people what you’re good at. You need to interact with the right people. Certain camps came up and I don’t want to use that word, but say certain people who were not even a part of the shoot used to arrive on the set, mix around and indulge in chit-chatting. I didn’t know how to do all this.

Did they want you to chit-chat with them?

Maybe, but I don’t know. Maybe it was my shortcoming. Everything can’t be someone else’s mistake.

Were you uncomfortable at parties?

Very much. It was a dilemma. I wanted to work and I didn’t want to go to parties. Anyway, all said and done, I had a long innings. At the end of the day, it was a very good innings.

There’s a lot of emotion in your voice. It makes me ask whether you ever thought of getting married?

Marriage! Haan, that ladoo jo khaye woh pachtaye aur jo nahin khaye woh bhi pachtaye (the sweet that you will regret whether you eat it or not). Well, there are some things that are not to be. I was not destined to get married, so it didn’t happen for me. I accept that with dignity. I would have loved to marry and have children. I love children. I was not bold enough to have them out of wedlock. I could have, but we are not going there.

But now?

Some people still tell me it’s not late to get married. Lekin itna bhi afsos nahin hai (There isn’t any regret). Today, my sister’s kids are my kids. I am alright.

If you love someone, you love that person forever. Right?

I am a very loyal person. I don’t betray people. I don’t take any relationship for granted. Have I benefited from this stance? I don’t know. Today, anyway, my family is the most important thing in my life. My mom passed away 8 years ago. I live with my sister and her child, she’s a single parent. My other sister has two children and two grandchildren. I live for all these members of my family. Sukh insaan ko wahin milta hai jahan woh dekhta hai (You tend to find happiness where you look for it).

20 years in the industry. Anybody from Bollywood in touch with you?


My best friend from the industry is Padmini Kapila. She comes here, sometimes. We have an unconditional, selfless friendship. A lot of people come here. I should make an effort to meet them.

Do you do that? Don’t old memories come rolling back and you feel that you should meet them?

No. Think of it, they also know I stay here. They can respect my age and contact me. If I reach out to them, they might meet. But it is possible that they might not meet too. People are running with their feet not on ground.

It was such a beautiful start you had. Helenji was shooting her last song in Mehboob Studios and you were shooting your first at the same time…

It was an unbelievable coincidence of life. I cannot even begin to say that how much I respect and admire Helenji. The fact of that matter is that I got space because she moved on and a vacuum was created. My arrival as a dancer from the days of ‘Manokamna’ where I played the lead was thanks to Dev Anand saab (Jab Chaye song from ‘Lootmaar’) and the right time that got created by Helenji’s departure.

Did you meet Helenji?

Yes, I met her at Mehboob Studios. She sent flowers for me on my birthday for the longest time and till date. Nobody can even think of being her. I am not even near being her.

Art is often inspired. Did you consciously or subconsciously imitate her?

No. Her time was different. The set was especially constructed for her. Around my time, things had got very quick. Get a trolley, get Vijay-Oscar, get Kalpana Iyer and shoot the song.

Heroines of today who are good dancers according to you?

Today, every heroine dances well. Dancing has reached another level. Priyanka Chopra and Deepika Padukone are fabulous, of course Madhuri Dixit and the late Sridevi get into the top category. Katrina too; she was fantastic in ‘Chikni Chameli’. I like Jacqueline Fernandez too..

I insist you put your hand on one…

I have always envied the beauty and finesse of Waheeda Rehmanji. Anything she did- her expressions, dance, acting- everything had so much dignity.

Among the heroes?

Kamal Haasan is a complete dancer, an amazing talent. As for timing in dancing, nobody can touch Govinda.

You were supposed to do Zihale Mishki from ‘Ghulami’ and Ranaji maaf karna from ‘Karan Arjun’…
I have no answer to what happened. I had even gone to Jaipur for the ‘Ghulami’ song. They didn’t bother to tell me why they didn’t shoot with me; I was told the song is not happening. As for ‘Karan Arjun’, it’s a mystery. I was contacted for the Ranaji song and I was supposed to do it- but suddenly I heard a stray conversation that I had asked for too much money. Arre, mere se baat toh kiya hota! (I wish they had spoken to me atleast).

Didn’t you not pick up the phone and speak to JP Dutta (‘Ghulami’) and Rakesh Roshan (‘Karan Arjun’)?If they didn’t think the need to even inform me, God bless them. Poochke kya milega? (What would I achieve by asking them about it?)

To conclude, I again ask you to pick one: Jab Chaye or Hari Om Hari or Rambha Ho?

Hari Om Hari. That song turned my life upside down. It became my calling card. I became so busy after that that I was shooting night and day.
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